


Maybe

by IvoryLotus



Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: Hide reflects, M/M, Pre-Canon, Unrequited Love, ghoul hide - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-03
Updated: 2020-09-03
Packaged: 2021-03-06 19:35:31
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,007
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26264308
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IvoryLotus/pseuds/IvoryLotus
Summary: Hide looks back on his life since he met Kaneki.
Relationships: Kaneki Ken | Sasaki Haise/Nagachika Hideyoshi
Comments: 3
Kudos: 26





	Maybe

When he moved he hadn’t expected to meet the one person who would become everything to him. He hadn’t planned on getting attached to anyone. Humans couldn’t be trusted and other ghouls were only a liability. Hide and his family remained under the radar of the CCG because they didn’t involve themselves with other ghouls and maintained a perfect human facade. 

However, when he saw the dark haired boy sitting on the river bank he froze. The boy was clearly lost within the world contained in paper, cradling the book like it was the most precious object in the world, and he couldn’t look away. He knew it was dangerous to get close with anyone but something about the boy drew him in like a moth to a flame. 

Before he even consciously registered the decision, he was already introducing himself and asking to be his friend. He would have been shocked at his own decision if he hadn’t been so distracted by the stunned expression directed at him. The boy looked like he had just asked to take a bite out of him instead of just asking to be his friend. 

Despite his obvious hesitation he agreed to be friends, but he agreed in a way that made it clear he didn’t think I would want to be his friend for very long. Maybe he thought I would get tired of him or move on to someone “better”, but I knew right then and there, when he gave me a cautious smile, that I would do anything for him. 

As the years went on, they continued to be best friends. Hide had thought about eating Kaneki’s relatives more than a few time, and the urge grew stronger with every new bruise that decorated Kaneki’s skin and only got worse when he found out Kaneki’s aunt was starving him. Despite how much he wanted to, he never went through with it because there was no guarantee that wherever Kaneki ended up would be any better than his situation with his aunt. 

At the very least, Hide could be there for Kaneki. He could provide him with food and make sure he ate, tend to his injuries if they got bad enough, and provide a safe place for Kaneki and his books when needed. 

When Kaneki turned fifteen he started working two jobs after school to save up enough to move out when he turned sixteen. Hide watched as he ran himself ragged and hated that he couldn’t do anything to help. However, just as Kaneki was about to move out, Hide’s parents decided they had been in one place for too long and it was time to move on.

There was no way he was about to leave Kaneki. So when the day came for Hide’s parents to move he went to Kaneki with a proposition. He and Kaneki ended up splitting the rent of a small apartment, Kaneki quit his second job and Hide made up the difference with his newly acquired job. 

Living with Kaneki was everything he hoped it would be. Seeing Kaneki happy and healthy for the first time ever was worth all the horrible human food he choked down. It was during this time that Hide realized he was in love with his best friend. 

He honestly should have been at least a little taken aback by that realization but loving Kaneki was so natural that he was more surprised it took him so long to realize he was in love with his best friend. He wanted to confess his feelings but he knew Kaneki wouldn’t be ready for something like that, and if he was being honest with himself, he was scared of being rejected. 

So he remained quiet and continued to support Kaneki as he always had. They applied to university together and both received full ride scholarships, Hide with a major in English and Kaneki with a major in literature. Their scholarships came with living stipends that allowed them to each afford their own apartment without working, and even though Hide really didn’t want to live in an apartment without Kaneki, he didn’t want to smother him either. 

They still saw each other every day and had sleep overs at least once a week so it was okay. Honestly they were so wrapped up in each other’s lives that their stuff was almost equally distributed between the two apartments. They lived in each other’s pockets and everyone who knew them knew it. 

It wasn’t until after the incident with Rize that their dynamic started to change. 

Hide had obviously been against the date from the very beginning. She was beautiful and graceful and loved the same books Kaneki did and he couldn’t help but compare himself to her. He honestly would have never left him alone in the café with her if he had known she would actually be interested in him. 

It’s not that he thought she was out of his league, because it was really the other way around, but he didn’t think Kaneki would work up the nerve to talk to her. When he got the call that Kaneki had scored a date he was so upset he nearly broke his phone. If Kaneki hadn’t sounded so happy, he would have tried to talk him out of the date, but in the end he could never ruin something that made Kaneki smile. 

Looking back, he should have. He should have done whatever it took to make sure Kaneki didn’t go on that date, because if he hadn’t then maybe things would have been different. Maybe he wouldn’t have gotten a call in the middle of the night saying that Kaneki had been involved in an accident and was barely clinging to life in the ICU. Maybe he wouldn’t have had to watch Kaneki struggle with his new reality. Maybe he could have told Kaneki the truth. That he was a ghoul and he loved him more than life itself. 

Maybe they could have been happy together.

**Author's Note:**

> This isn't how I planned on ending this story when I started writing it, but as I was writing I felt like the ending came naturally.  
> I'm playing with the idea of making this into a series, but I haven't decided yet.  
> In the mean time, thank you for reading my short story! I hope you enjoyed it!


End file.
